Being a Working Mom

I love being a mom.  It's the best job in the world.  I love being a school counselor.. it's the best career in the world!  Both can be so incredibly exhausting at times... but when I lay my head down at night, I know every tear, scream, mess to clean up, spanking when necessary, bottle made, diaper changed, pee in the underwear, food wiped off the face, toy tripped over, laundry overflowing the basket, nighttime story and prayer, corrective behavior, yell in the hallway or lunchroom...was totally worth it.  Some moments at home I want to scream in frustration... then the next my heart is so full of joy because Makson comes willingly, and gives me a hug and a kiss, and says, "I love you, Mommy."  Or Kaden looks up and grins that snaggle tooth smile and melts my little heart... Or when a kid runs to me in the hallway and says "I'm having a great day Mrs. Allred! Thanks for the help yesterday!"  Or cries in my office because their parents are divorcing, and I can be that one constant in their life for the time being...  all of the sudden all those little, petty things that happened at work and at home...don't matter anymore. 

Being a working mom definitely has its advantages and disadvantages.  I often ponder how life would be if I chose to stay at home instead of going to work every day.  I absolutely adore my job and the opportunity I have to influence student's and make a difference in a kid's life.  I also really enjoy the adult conversation I get to have every day... I'm not going to lie- it's really nice!  Sometimes though when I'm driving my kids to the babysitters I notice some of the other moms walking with their little ones snug away in the stroller, and my heart gets a little jealous.  What would it be like if I didn't have a career??? Let's ponder that...

Well, my alarm wouldn't be set to go off at 6:20.  When currently it does.. then I proceed to hit the snooze button multiple times until it is eventually 6:45.  Then I'm like "crap, it's already 6:45, we need to leave in 30 minutes.."  which never happens by the way!  Of course it did the first couple weeks of school, then slowly but surely I figure out exactly what time I could get out of bed, get ready, get the kids ready and in the car, to the babysitters and walk in the door to work.  Which I can do with getting up at 6:45... so there ya go.  My hair usually looks like crap, but makeup is always done!  However, if I was a stay at home mom... who cares if my hair is in a ponytail every day and if my makeup is perfect??  Mak will tell me my hair looks good if it's in 5 pigtails sticking straight up!

But then again... when Mak wakes up whining and crying because he doesn't want to watch Mickey Mouse and we have the wrong juice, and his bar is broken in half so he doesn't want to eat it... I am more than happy to load his little butt in the car and drive to the babysitter's!  Where of course is where the car rides come in.... which will be a new post.  I have way too many stories about the car rides to include them all on here!

Anyhow... any working mom could probably relate to the guilt they sometimes feel about not being home with their kids during the day.  I use to feel it more often, but now I know at this time in my life I'm not cut out to be a stay at home mom.  Don't get me wrong... I think I'm a good mother... I just think people are all called to do different things... I think being a stay at home mom is not for everyone.  Some are just better at it than others.  I often worry if I was a stay at home mom CPS would be called on me within a week!  I'm just not sure I have the patience.... especially when dealing with my lovely almost 3 year old.

Sure staying home has its perks, and sure maybe I'm missing out on some things with my kids when I'm at work... but is it really detrimental to my kids? I actually had a mother this summer come to my school to talk to me about her own child.  She was admiring the pics of my boys (that are posted all over my office) and asked me if I wanted any more children.  I said sure, at least one ore two more! She then proceeded to tell me that she didn't agree with that, and it was not fair to my children for me to work and to continue to have kids.  Her words were short, and she didn't carry on about it; however, her words hurt and are something I'll carry with me forever.  I often think about what she said, and wonder... should I have more kids?  Is it fair to reproduce then go to work and pawn them onto someone else for 8-9 hours a day?  Maybe she had a point... but I do know that if I stayed at home, I would not have influenced the 100's of kids I have at work.  Is it possible to be a working mom, and have the ability to influence kids at school, and my own children, to the extent that I want to? 

Two jobs- Being a Mom and have my career... lots of people do it.  People ask where I get the energy to do it all... Easy- the look on all my kid's faces when I've made a difference!